Last night I watched Paris Hilton's new reality show--My New BFF--it's a competition where the winner gets to be Hilton's best friend. The premise of the show is mind-boggling if you think about it. What kind of person wants to be best friends with Paris Hilton?

I have to admit, I was curious to see how much groveling and butt-sniffing a celebrity hound will do in order to win the "friendship" of Paris Hilton. I'm also curious about the strange things people eat, so you know Andrew Zimmern's Bizarre Foods is a big hit with me. I'm curious about the mating habits of praying mantis and sea horses--you can't beat Animal Planet's Most Extreme for cool outliers. And oh--freaks of nature! I love stuff like conjoined cucumbers and very strange medical conditions. I'm a curious person, and if it's weird, all the better.

So yes, I can do morally grotesque when my curiosity gets the better of me. From what I can tell, superficiality goes a long way with Paris Hilton. Something else that seems apparent is the vast spiritual impoverishment of Hilton's red carpet, clubby lifestyle. One contestant actually said, "I can do this--I used to sleep in ditches." Wow--listening to that was almost as good as watching Andrew Zimmern eat a freshly harvested, still-beating frog heart.

My New BFF has got to be one of the most empty-headed exercises in celebrity narcissism I've ever seen. There's even a treacly music video to go with:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukEHVvUpn40

If Berg was alive, we'd surely get a revelation to go with this.