I think the biggest damage to my family from TF was separation from my biological children. It's so wrong for kids to be separated and in hindsight it is easy to see how wrong it was but I am sure most who got into the Family did so with good motives due to being vulnerable.

Being an adolescent is a vulnerable state. I was not supposed to have a lot of judgement at that age but at the same time I was supposed to believe I knew better than old folks. (talking about that stage of life.)

Another very hard thing was adjusting to life outside of the Family with small children and no support or trust for others or TOO much trust of others who could not understand the experience of surviving a cult.

Financially there was much suffering and hardship but I wouldn't trade that for staying in the Family!

Hardship builds character and it certainly did in my children and in me too.
Still, I would have preferred a broad base of support, or some support upon getting out.

I have gotten past my hurts as far as every area EXCEPT for spirituality. I cannot connect with a higher power and don't think I will ever be able to.

> Sorry Gin, I just saw this. I agree with
> what you said about responsibility and
> choices (they do go hand in hand), and yet
> it was so hard to learn to take
> responsibility and trust my own choices when
> I left the COG.

> I heard a joltingly horrible and wonderful
> statement from a very wise lady who has
> survived a lot.

> She said the bad news is, who you are is
> the some total of your choices. The good
> news is, you have a choice from this moment
> on who you will be.

> Well, I had to add that other's choices have
> a great deal of power, but there come a time
> when we don't have to give them that power
> anymore.

> I think you are well on your way to a new
> tomorrow, lady.