> You have to
> understand that my child is not a very
> cooperative person either.

I understand what it's like to work with uncooperative children--I made a living at it for quite some time. I take the position that it's up to the adults, particularly the professionals who are responsible for helping children, to figure out ways to help the child learn how to be more cooperative.

Kids aren't born saying, "I hate school" or "School is a waste of time. I want to drop out." Things happen along the way where they get stuck in a cycle of frustration, negativity, and failure.

Unfortunately, teachers aren't always trained in ways to help kids break out of self-defeating patterns of behavior, and so they'll throw up their hands and say, "You're unteachable!" Well, you have to ask, "What is getting in the way of this kid's ability to learn?" Or, in your child's case, what is contributing to his/her uncooperative behavior?

Kids often will act oppositional and defiant (uncooperative) because they see it as an effective way to cope with conflicting demands they geel are being asked of them. Do this! No, do that! Do that, but do it this way! I told you to do this that way, didn't I?

Is s/he just a "bad seed" (this is TF's explanation for problem behavior) or is there something going on (like the perception of conflicting demands) that contributes to the uncooperative behavior and could be changed? Now we're getting into the area where a good school counselor or social worker might be of help to your child succeed with a different coping strategy.

If you don't have those resources available, and it seems that dropping out is what's going to happen, it may be your child has to learn through the school of hard knocks. Not everyone is cut out to do well in school, particularly the way certain schools are set up and run. Remember, it's never too late to start learning and get an education. My ex dropped out of school in the 10th grade, but eventually went back to school (at age 22) and earned an engineering degree at university at age 32!