Hey, Geo is the book-finder! I am hurting for and with you. You and "tired" are really in a fight. You both seem to have some professional help, hopefully good help. That's important to keep things relative, and often to realize, it's not You that's the problem, it's the child, and you are, you really are doing all you know to do. They will know that one day. I promise.

In the natural it seems pretty hopeless. I'd imagine that at times it doesn't seem like this war can be won. Can I ask if you have a close friend who is a person of prayer and faith? I know that in some really dark times I turned to the Lord and a friend who hung in there with me in prayer. We met weekly and prayed for my son. When it looked the darkest and most hopeless I could turn to her and holler a bit (you are welcome to do that here too) and we would pray for an hour or more. Miracles are possible. I am a living witness of that. Our prayers are with you as well.

It's odd, I have a friend at work who's daughter is experiencing psychotic dreams, and now they come when she's awake, in the classroom. She's on some pretty strong meds. He's a pastor now but was in a Church fro several years that was really abusive and controlling until his wife had a nervous breakdown. He got out but a lot of damage was done to him and his family. No new thing under the sun, huh? I'm his prayer friend now.